Mama What?: 2009

Ye Olde Blogge

So many of you (ok so that's assuming you're still reading this after MONTHS of inactivity...) know that this is a "spin-off", if you will, of my WNY Mommies blog back in Joizey.

Since that blog is no longer in working order (Justine, what the heck?? ;) ) and I really would like all my thoughts in one place, I will be posting OLD blogs here mixed in with NEW blog posts.

I apologize in advance if it's confusing but really, it's for me not for you so deal with it. Cheeky? Maybe. But I'd like to save this site one day as a Journal of my Early Motherhood and that's the best way I know how to have all my published thoughts in one place.

I'll post in order so reading from the bottom up is the correct sequence, as youje.

There are several posts in the old blog that are event-related that I won't be adding to this blog. I'll only post the updates that concerned my trials, joys, and questions regarding parenting and life post baby.

And we're off.... scroll down for the first two months of my blog posts as a new mom in West New York. More to come....

TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 30

Pottery Barn

Oh.My.God.

Has everyone seen this???

It's bad-a**, yes, but at $1358.00 (set plus island) I think it costs more than the kitchen I am supplied with in my apartment.

Since when did "pretend kitchens" start looking so realistic? Isn't imagination the key component in playing house? I'm pretty sure I just had a box with an easy-bake oven inside...

WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 24

Visit the South

For those of you who haven't ever traveled South of the Tri-State, I recommend a 4-day weekend in the Southern States.If you can get past the scary crosses that say "Blood Secured Redemption" you will find a whole new world awaits you.

A world of hospitality and friendliness, of greenery and winding roads, ofinterstate shoulderspeppered with wildflowers, of down-home cookin' and cheap local crafts, of history and hauntings, of pride and family values...

The South has a special place in my heart and my history.

My Mom, Viking by heritage, was born and raised in the South so much of my upbringing was infused with Southern traditions.

If you'd like some ideas of where to go, email me...because us Southerners don't get out much ;) and most of my traveling while I lived in FL was to Southern States and coastal towns.

MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 22

Personal Space Issues

It's true -- I need my personal space.

No, I am not referring to the area around me personally...just the actual storage space *or lack thereof* in our apartment.

I know what you are thinking -- either "Amen Sista" or "Stop complaining because my sister's friend lives in the city in a 600 sq ft studio with her husband, toddler, baby, and dog and they manage just fine."

And while I'd like to say "Wow, impressive," all that comes to mind is, "What is wrong with those people??"

Seriously.

We are barely scratching the surface of 1100 sq ft ourselves...and there's an extra 75 sq ft included for our ridiculously long hallway entrance that shouldn't count as living space.

Not to mention there are only 4 closets in the house, none of which are linen closets and none are actually big enough to walk into.

We accumulate so much with Hunter, too...more so than I thought possible...the place is never clean & organized looking anymore -- I just move toys and gyms and playmats from one part of the home to another to free up space and appear uncluttered...and it's starting to look like a storage unit will be our only salvation.

My issue is they are so overpriced and by the end of the year or two you've spent more on the storage than what the contents are actually worth...b/c if you could live withou

t it in your home for 2 years, chances are you could live without it forever.

The reason I am ranting is because on our weekend getaway this past weekend, I was reminded of how CHEAP land is elsewhere.

Devastatingly and painfully cheap.

Take this house, for example: 209 Crawford Glen

It may not be a luxury home but it's a spacious, 4bed/4.5bath, 3700 sq ft new construction fully-upgraded home in Greenville, SC (where we flew into from Newark) in a beautiful, wooded neighborhood within walking distance of the local town. It's going for $529,000. That hurts. Our apartment would cost almost that much if it were for sale here!!

I'm sure I sounded like a pompous, out-of-touch jacka** when I said this but ---> When we got off the plane in SC, I saw a large sign with a listing for 36 acres of land with a 5 bedroom ranch on it for less than $500,000 and I said "OMG, hunny -- it's not even half a mil! "

I realize to someone living in SC, 500Gs is a serious life-long investment. It is to us, too...but when you've become accustomed to the overpriced living of NY, it seems like SUCH a great deal.

I don't ever want to become one of those women who takes money for granted. I don't think I ever could. I know how hard Travis works so that I can stay home and I know the state of economy could take away our lifestyle at any given moment.

But is it too much to ask for a house? With a lawn? In the 'burbs? Evidently it is if we plan on living in the tri-state within commuting distance. Even Westchester is flaunting Manhattan prices these days.

I'm signing off for the night...if you need me, I'll be devising a shelf and pulley system so we can utilize our ceiling space for additional storage.

FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 12

Sleeping Through the Night

Trav, as most of you know, is rarely home. He works long, stressful hours and in turn so do I.

I'm used to being the sole caretaker of Hunter during the week.

I do his morning routine, eating schedules, afternoon routine, nap schedules, bedtime routine, overnight shift, and all in between. :)

It's a lot of work but you learn to schedule as best as possible and expect the unexpected.

Typically, Hunter will go to sleep somewhere between 9:30-10pm. It's not exact b/c he puts himself to sleep...I put him down at 9:30, though.

He'll wake up anywhere between 6-7am for a bottle then go back down until 9:30am.

Since he's been teething this past week (#11 just showed up -- yikes! ouchy bites!!) he's had a hard time sleeping through the night.

I have had to go in at least once in between bedtime at 10pm and bottle at 6-7am to put him back to sleep.

This has occurred 3 days in a row.

However, when Travis sees how exhausted I am, he offers to take the night shift. When Trav takes the shift, Hunter sleeps through the night.

I wondered how Hunter knew his Papa was on-call until I realized that Trav doesn't have Mommy Sonar. *Mommy Sonar is our instinct to jump out of bed seconds before our baby makes a night-noise that sounds like waking.*

So when Hunter makes his noises and wakes up, Trav sleeps through them (or practices what I like to call the Papa Neglect tactic which isn't real neglect except in the eyes of the mother) and Hunter puts himself back to sleep.

Mystery solved.

Now if only I could bring myself to practice this strategy, I may actually get some sleep! ;)

FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 5

I Was a Really Good Mom before I Had Kids

I decided after Hunter was 3 months old that I'd get back to reading every night before bed. By that time, I had mastered a bedtime routine (or so I thought) and was ready to get my ownroutine back in motion.

More than anything, I wanted to have 15-20 minutes of down-time in between putting the little man to sleep and trying to put myself to sleep. I noticed that, even at my most exhausted, I was too wired from being non-stop all day to relax enough to sleep at night.

My favorite before-bed past-time has always been reading a chapter or two of my current book before closing my eyes and drifting off to dreamland. I made it my mission to start this up again and I'm happy to report I succeeded.

That being said, my book list has changed since I've become a Mom. I still read my femme novels, my historic biographies, and my monthly subscriptions but I've added parenting booksand books that make fun of parenting books to the mix. I'm torn between wanting to know everything out there (so I can make an educated, informed decision about child-rearing) and knowing that no matter how much I read it's all going to come down to what I feel in my heart versus what a well-published doctor has convinced me to do.

Regardless, I read it all. I have the Super Nanny's books, the Shalom in the Home rabbi's books, the Baby Whisperer, the What to Expect series, the Baby Signs, the Raise a Smarter Child by..., the Bringing up Geeks, the Happiest Baby books, I could go on. Like. Forever.

I have run out of bookshelves and I've started stacking my books to make forts for Hunter to play in.

Reading about parenting and ways to laugh at parenting has made me realize that we all want the answers and there are no "right" ways to parent our children. It's also made me realize that I really want to get back to reading about summer romances in the Hamptons and Princesses from forgotten Chinese Dynasties.

When I read about parenting before bed, my dreams are clouded with reality. Ugh! Who wants to dream about our actual lives?

I've also learned something else. I need some of these parenting books to help me feel normal in my quest to want to be the best Mommy I can be. The book I read most recently (see blog title and click link) had three statements as an intro to the first chapter that were SO "me" it scared me:

- You dread the question "What did you do all day?"

- You consider a trip to the dentist your special "alone time".

- Reading before bed feels like a luxury.

Oh. My. Gosh. It's like this author is reading this blog.

The fact is, there are many moms just like me out there. Knowing that makes me feel a little less alone and a lot more validated.

WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 3

Comparison is the killer of Contentment

I've said it before --- I consider myself very fortunate. Here I am, a new Mom, in what is possibly one of the best places to live as a young parent. Every time I stroll along the Promenade I meet new Mommies and see familiar friends and neighbors.

It brings me back to the original intention of this Mommy Group. When Susie and I met, it was out of a need for companionship. We found true friends in each other and thus the group grew.

We went from a "wee" group of 2 in early September to a group of 25 in exactly one year!

My intentions for finding and belonging to a Mommy Group were to be supported and accepted by other parents...to be a friend and neighbor, a confidante and advocate...to help others feel like they are not alone in their quest for the best childcare in the area or the most effective toy-cleaning methods...to be amongst friends who cared for my son and I could count on if I had to leave him in case of an emergency...to be relied on as someone who would listen to the incessant venting about poopy diapers and absent fathers...I could go on forever here. So I'll stop.

Mainly, I wanted to find a group of parents who were not judgmental or competitive and who applauded Hunter's accomplishments instead rating how far along he was developmentally.

I think that I've found that group in us and I just wanted to Thank You all for being supporting roles in Hunter's life.

By the way, if anyone does become competitive -- please know that I'll be the first person to call you out on it. ;) A great book about this is "Sippy Cups are Not for Chardonnay". Check it out! :)

TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 2

Might as Well Face it, I'm Addicted...

...To Boots!!

I can not tell you how many pairs I own.

Mainly because I don't think I can count that high. *Anyone with me here? Has talking baby-talk the past 7 months dumbed me down?*

I think my addiction stems from my Florida Habit ---> bikinis. I own over 60 of them.

Granted, I wore them year-round down there. Now I have two under-the-bed storage containers FULL of bathing suits. I refuse to get rid of them. One day I may make a quilt. A scratchy, sequiny quilt. One that would be water-proof and stringy.

So I've moved on to something I could never wear in Florida ---> boots.

I love 'em.

I find myself checking all the fashion blogs for new "releases".

My addiction, lucky for Trav, does not necessarily include purchasing...it's more having to know every style offered.

(In case there is a boot pop quiz one day or if someone asks me where they can find the latest ankle-bootie by Minnetonka. I will know where to send them. I won't let them down!)

So my Boot Quest has led me down a dark path -- down a path of never-ending Uggs and Emus that look ugly and feel comfy...

down a path of tattooed suede a la Heart and Soul or Ed Hardy...

down this season's trend of studs, fringe, and biker buckles...

and it has led me here:

Giuseppe Zanotti

HOTTTTTT booties!

On sale for $1195.00!

4" MIRRORED heels, ladies!

Lace-up!

Suede and patent leather, of course!

And I wonder to myself, "WHO wears these?" Not just "Who spends this much money on something ridiculously trendy?" but "WHO wears these?" Seriously.

A mirrored heel? The only person who would need a mirror on their heel would be someone who can put their ankle up to their face to touch up their lipstick. So many thoughts come to my mind when I look at these dead-sexy but outrageous boots.

The last thought I had was this -- since when did I start judging people on their shoes? Am I already that PTA mom? Can a woman not wear sex-pot shoes without me assuming she is what she wears? When will this transformation "from me to Mom" end? Save yourselves. I fear it's too late for me...

I was THISCLOSE to buying Crocs.

WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 27 - 2008

Feeling Maternal, Amused, and Fortunate

Maternal:

Today our sitter came for a few hours so I could take "off" and run errands. Not fun errands but errands without a baby, nonetheless.

I had on my "uniform" which consists of a patterned cotton blend dress (easy to launder at home, dark colors that don't show spit-up or pureed carrots, partially hides my post-preg tummy, appears like I am making an effort) and my FitFlops (that I wear b/c they are comfy and also everyone assumes I am trying to "tone" my legs which makes me feel less lazy).

My hair was in a pony tail (because Hunter pulls it all out if it's down) mainly because I really need to get it colored and cut but haven't had a chance.

I was excited to have my hands free for the first time all week, so I was drumming on my steering wheel with my windows down, singing along to my CD player.

At a stoplight, I looked over to the car next to me b/c I felt a pair of eyes watching me. You know when you just get that strange feeling? It was a young guy, probably 19, getting a kick out of the "concert" I was putting on.

It was at that moment that I realized I was blasting ABBA's Greatest Hits and singing "Lay All Your Love on Me" as though I was the lead role in Mamma Mia.

And then it hit me.

I'm. A. Mom.

Not just Hunter's Mommy...

I am an actual MOM!!

The kind who wears their hair back with predictable comfy clothes and shoes and listens to music that the younger generations wouldn't even know if they weren't in current movies.

(It's like when I saw "I am Sam" for the first time and LOVED the soundtrack and my parents were like "Duh! Welcome to The Beatles.")

So let's face it, kids...I never thought I'd be one but here I am less than 7 months in and already eagerly singing show tunes in the car on the way to the grocery store.

Watch out, Mom-Jeans, I will find you and wear you!

**On a side note, on the way to Boston last weekend we saw a son and his Mom driving to college with a dorm-room packed car and a UCONN bumper sticker in the back window. I totally LOST it and sobbed to Travis "Our little boy is going to leave us!" When did this happen? Trav's worried b/c Hunter hasn't even started Daycare, let alone Preschool, K-5, Junior High, or High School...College seems so far away until you see it driving next to you.

Amused:

Tonight I ran into a good Mommy friend on the Promenade. She introduced me to her husband as an organized (not!) Super Mom. It made me laugh b/c anyone who knows me well can tell you otherwise. It also made me remember this email I sent out to a girlfriend a few weeks ago...

"So I've finally given up...I'll admit it. I am not, nor will I ever be, Wonder Woman.

I wish I was.

She has that cool invisible helicopter and arm cuffs...we all know how much I love arm cuffs!! :)

But the fact of the matter is, you can't paint and redecorate a bathroom in 3 hours unless you are on a TLC show with helpers.So my new and improved Kiddie Bathroom is not yet new and improved. Although it will be by Friday if you'd like to come take a looksy.

I'm not Wonder Woman...and sometimes I think I am because sometimes Travis thinks I am...but that's no fun...because when he thinks I am, he expects me to be and that is just too much pressure. ;)

Besides, the best part of being Wonder Woman is the element of surprise...and if I say "Surprise! I painted the bathroom, cooked dinner, taught Hunter his alphabet, and organized a Baby Shower" and Trav says "What did you do the rest of the day?" then I am just an adult in a cape and arm cuffs.

Anyways if you are wondering what this off the wall email is about, it's an apology. Sorry I wasn't myself tonight. I was dealing with the disappointment of reality --- well, that and I inhaled fumes for about 3 hours straight and my virginal (to drugs) body went haywire. ha ha

I'm off to make sure a munchkin is sleeping and install a bubble blowing frog in his tub. Goodnight!"

Fortunate:

And speaking of the Promenade, how lucky are we to be able to walk along the Hudson (ick) River with a breath-taking view of the city every day and night? My favorite time of day is dusk...the sun has set and the buildings reflect gold in their windows. SOOOO pretty!! But best-of-all is the Ben and Jerry's along the walk. No, not really. Best-of-all is that I can go on a walk with Hunter and run into familiar faces and friends all along the way. We have suc

h a great community here and our Mommy support system is better than I ever imagined it could be. Thanks for being there for me and Hunter. :) Here's a pic from my iPhone tonight:

Hunter is watching the City Lights and kicking his foot against the stroller to try and knock my water bottle out so he can play with it. Little Monkey!

MONDAY, AUGUST 25

True Friends

This weekend's trip to Boston re-affirmed my feelings about what true friends are...not to get sappy on you but I feel the need to share.

True friends invite you on trips that could be easier without the added challenge of a second baby's schedule in the mix.

True friends are enthusiastic about your arrival even when you're venting about the 7-hour drive with traffic on the way there.

True friends allow you to feel comfortable being your real self...so you can be frustrated with your spouse for being late, excited by the Arctic Seal exhibit at the Aquarium, or exhausted when your baby cries through breakfast and they understand.

True friends celebrate each other's baby's accomplishments rather than compete by comparing who nursed longer, which baby walked first, etc.

True friends contribute to conversations, voice their opinions, guide you through new experiences, and are there to listen.

True friends make the most of any situation because when you're a new parent, you learn to take full advantage of the time you are given with each other.

We're lucky to have found such true friends in our neighborhood. Thank you to our friendly fellow West New York Mommas & Poppas. :)

10:48 AM Edit This 0 Comments »

Disclaimer: I am sicker than sick and on LOTS of Tylenol (since it's the only safe remedy while nursing) so if this blog post is nonsensical, just go about your business and pretend you never read it.

So a month has come and gone and Baby K is a HUGE baby. Almost 11 lbs already -- just about 4 lbs of weight gain in as many weeks. Which makes me wonder...if he's gaining, why aren't I losing?

But I digress...

Hunter still is doing really well with his little brother. On occasion, he'll steal his blankie or lovie and run around the living room whooping and hollering triumphantly but usually he just gives him kisses and says "bebe bubba" repeatedly.

The chapter of our life here in Orlando is coming to a gradual close...we're debating between Austin and Atlanta *Buckhead* for our next home since Travis has been offered jobs in both locations. We're hoping to have made a decision by the end of this week. I'll post more when we decide.

While I love living here, close to friends and family, it's also exhausting...every weekend we're booked with Birthday parties and other events -- while it's a good thing it's also taking a toll on me while I am still adjusting to semi-sleepless nights of nursing an infant. I'm looking forward to having our own space and establishing a much needed routine with Kingston. By this time, Hunter was in his own crib yet Kingston still curls up next to me to fall asleep at night. I relish it but also know it'll be my downfall if I don't sleep train him soon. I refuse to have a 1-year old still keeping me up at night.

It's bittersweet having Baby K grow up so fast...bitter because chances are good he's our last child and I want him to stay "baby" for as long as possible...sweet because he seems like he's in a rush to play with his big brother and I can't wait to see the dynamic between the two of them.

Our lives have morphed quickly from BFGF in Orlando -- to moving to NY -- to married and pregnant -- to a family of four. Now I feel like I have everything I want -- all the love I can ask for from my husband and two sons -- and it doesn't really matter where we are or what we're doing. I just want to be together. It's such a simple desire and one I am sure most moms can relate to...I've never cherished anything more and I've never wanted anything so easily attained.

I'm signing off for now...need a nap and some rehydration. Here's hoping the baby stays well...

A Mommy PSA (Public Service Announcement)

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Ever feel like your child is trying to tell you something?

Has this happened to you?

Moments after strapping on your youngster's shoes, they tear the velcro open and kick them off only to run around the house screaming...

Well here's the thing ---> this happens to us frequently. Since Hunter has learned how to take off his shoes, even though he typically loves wearing them because he equates them with going to school, this has become a daily ritual. Mommy or Papa puts the shoes on, Hunter takes the shoes off. Repeat. Incessantly.

So on one busy morning last week, I was too preoccupied to notice the difference in Hunter's behavior during his shoe-off routine. Travis put the shoes on and told me they wouldn't fit properly with his socks. Assuming Travis wasn't as skilled as I was at putting on his shoes (why this is my first inclination, I don't know but as a Mom I tend to think I have all the tricks and Papa doesn't) I suggested he allow Hunter to wear the shoes without socks b/c we were just going to 2 Dr appointments and coming home.

While we were out, Hunter had a total breakdown. First, he wanted his shoes off and we scolded him b/c we were out and didn't want him barefoot in the medical facility. Then he started whining so Trav picked him up. Then when he asked for me, I couldn't hold him b/c of my C-Section (it was just 5 days afterwards) but I thought Hunter was under the impression that I couldn't hold him b/c I was holding Kingston so I chalked Hunter's crying fit up to jealousy.

Hunter cried and begged and cried some more. Then we got home and I calmed him down. Then he went to school. Then we picked him up from school only to learn his teacher held him most of the day b/c he wasn't doing well there either. When we undressed him for his bath we noticed a HUGE blister on the back of his foot.

UGH!!!!!

What horrible parents we are!! We didn't even THINK about that being an issue. He is growing out of his shoes! :( So after soothing him and checking it -- it turned out to just be a swollen spot on his foot, but a painful one nonetheless that he was trying to tell us about.

I was in disbelief for about 3o minutes, with Hunter in my arms as I sat cautiously on the sofa. Disbelief that my Mommy Intuition failed me. Is it because I spent such little time with him in recent days since I've been nursing 24/7? Is the intuition something you lose if you don't practice it daily?

Disbelief that I actually assumed Hunter was jealous b/c Kingston was with mommy -- when in fact, Hunter's world doesn't revolve around me. He was just hurting and wanted his Mommy to fix it.

I've got to tell you the whole incident breaks my heart. And while it wasn't the most major thing that could've happened it definitely was an eye-opener for me and I thought I'd share it so you other parents out there might read the signs better for your own brood.

Needless to say, Hunter has been to a shoe-fitting since and we have learned he is a 5XW (extra wide, go figure!) so most baby shoes (even though he has about 10 pair) don't work. And here I am, corkscrewing his foot in the shoe like so many other moms before me told me to do.

This incident made me feel like SUCH an unaware, absent parent. I know that's not the case but...

If the shoe fits...

Where to Begin?

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So much has happened in the past month that I think is blog-worthy -- let's see if I can remember even a fraction of it to journal tonight. :)

Mommy brain has replaced pregnesia in the worst way.

First and foremost, our second son, Kingston Miles, was born on Wednesday, June 3rd.

For all the deets:

9:18am

7 lbs 3.5 oz

19.5 in

C-sec

39 weeks "old"

We were out of the hospital by Friday with no complications on the baby's/mommy's side and everyone is healthy and happy to be home.

Kingston is a doll. He's long and lean, fair and blonde. Where did he come from, you ask? Probably my mom's Norweigan side. Who knows?

He's super sweet and loves to eat and sleep - like all newborns. It's a nice change from the rambunctious, raucous 16-month old we have running around wreaking havoc in the house.

I remember when Hunter was this age and I wondered what I was doing or what I could do to help the little guy sleep through the night. I read EVERY book out there. I changed his feeding schedule. I changed my diet since I was breast-feeding. I changed everything I could -- except my perspective.

Now, having a second it's amazing how something like a sleepless night you just brush off and chalk it up to having a newborn. Now I know it's just a temporary phase and if I deal with it one night at a time it's a non-issue. Funny how important it was to me before to "figure things out"...I feel like a seasoned mom now. Taking things as they come and accepting them for what they are.

Travis has been really enjoying this time with Kingston. He didn't get a lot of "face-time" with Hunter at this age since he was working so much.

Now he has a better understanding of how devoted and committed my days were to Hunter when he was a newborn. Especially when you are nursing...your whole world revolves around their schedule 24/7.

Uh-oh, someone's hungry. Case in point.

More to come later. :)

Time for an Update

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YIKES! It's been about a month since my last update. Sorry ya'll!

I've had some major preoccupations to say the least so I am not feeling as guilty as I should about keeping my blog current.

It's a relief not having to *since this isn't a communal blog* and I've let it slip.

SO tonight I promise to write when K's asleep or nursing...I have so much to say.

Stay tuned...

Part-Time Mommy

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We finally did it -- Hunter has begun Part-Time Day Care as of yesterday.

I am THRILLED with the decision, though it's still too early to say that I s'pose.

I know he will get sick more frequently...he'll even pick up some new bad habits.

But the benefits outweigh the set-backs in this case -- at least in my opinion.

Hunter is being socialized with other children 6 hours per day.

He gets 1 hour of outdoor play so even on hot days when his preggy Mommy can't stand to be outside, he is playing in the shade with other little tots.

He has an hour of craft-time every day in which he artistically expresses himself with paints and crayons and clay --- things we hadn't tried to use yet here at home.

He's learning his alphabet and other fun nursery rhymes.

He sits at a table and eats his snack without being buckled into a highchair.

He's learning how to be more independent and coming home FILTHY dirty. :)

On a mommy side-note, I get 6 straight un-interrupted hours of ME time daily. Woooohooooo!

Granted I usually use that time for chores and organization and cooking but I can rest when I want to as well. I've laid out by the pool reading my Kindle. I've called long-distance friends and caught up. I've even *gasp* napped!!

I'm so happy we decided to go with the day care option. And to think, I was feeling guilty when other Moms told me it's best to keep your kids at home with you until Kindergarten! Not this Momma! :)

We're both getting bigger...

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I am growing daily...hourly, even.

However I've noticed a shift in Hunter's weight as well.

If you knew Hunter before we moved from West New York, then you knew he was the "Heavyweight" of the baby boys in the 'hood.

He was always in the 100th percentile for weight and was "solid" instead of being roly-poly.

Definitely line-backer material...

Since we've arrived in Orlando, he has gained 3 lbs!! We've only been here for 5 weeks or so.

I am not impressed...he's absolutely over-eating (thanks to being around the Grandparents 24/7 I'm sure) and now has broken the 28lb mark.

My word!!

When we left WNY I was able to pick him up easily, being just at 25lbs.

Now it's a struggle to get him out of his highchair or off the changing table without feeling like my back will go out.

It's crazy b/c he is so active now...running, dancing, walking, jumping off of things...I thought for sure he'd lose some of his baby weight.

In his pics, you can't tell how chubby he's getting. And it's not that I mind it at all -- you know I love me some chubby babies! :)

Hopefully the fact that he's the largest kid in his daycare class starting next week doesn't create any issues. He towers over the other little boys and I don't want him to be a bully -- or be bullied -- as a result.

Updates to follow...

30th Birthday

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"Happy Cake Cake to me..."

That's how I used to sing Happy Birthday when I was just a year older than Hunter. :)

And seriously, this 30th Birthday of mine last weekend was ALL about the cake. Or at least the desserts in general.

I had Apple Cobbler at my Surprise Party Friday night, Grand Marnier Souffle on our date night Birthday dinner on Saturday night, and two cakes for the Family Celebration on Sunday!

I am STUFFED and showing it - big time.

I have 5 weeks to go before Hunter becomes a big brother and I can't imagine growing any larger than I am. I have BLOWN up. My entire body...my face is way chubby, and I'm feeling very "tree-trunky" in the legs and arms. My booty has grown exponentially and of course my tummy trumps them all. The only thing(s) that haven't grown are my "girls" (ahem!) -- of course.

I am looking forward to being able to see my knees again -- or at least my toes. And don't even get me started on anything higher up...

My friends all sent me Birthday wishes with the cutesy phrases like "Dirty 30", "Flirty, 30, and Fabulous", "Purdy 30", etc...and all I'm feeling is "Sturdy 30" because it would take a semi truck to move me these days.

Ok so maybe I'm being hard on myself...it's just that I hardly pictured myself at 150lbs when I turned 30. Granted, I realize it's for a good cause. I am 30, married, with *almost* 2 sons...what more could I want? It seems to be I am in a perfect place at the perfect age...and I usually feel that way...until I catch a glimpse of my reflection in the window and wonder who the old heavy-set woman is looking at me. Gasp! That's me? I need some sleep! And eye cream! And cheek-liposuction!

I know I'm just being complain-y. I really shouldn't. But it's my party and I'll cry if I want to.

Happy Earth Day!!

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Lu's Wedd'n

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Well, we survived our wedding weekend...and by "we" I mean "I".

I had little energy to spare after two days of get-togethers but I managed to make it work long enough to even attempt a dance, a la MIA at the Grammys, at the wedding.

Here are a few of the pics:

I know what you're asking yourself...has Trav gone Amish? And the answer is no...but he certainly hasn't shaved (or even trimmed) his facial hair for WEEKS much to my dismay. However on Thursday he has agreed to go get a shave and haircut while he's back in NYC. Hopefully he finds a barber down here in FL that he trusts because I did not marry a bear. Or so I thought.

On to more random updates:

--Now the wedding is over, I have lots of little details to tend to -- Dr's appts for Hunter and myself, finding a decent shoe repair place (a lost service down here as no one walks anywhere -- it's not a pedestrian city), calling and catching up with my WNY Moms, getting Hunter into a more routine play-date schedule, pre-registering at my OB's hospital, continuing our new home search, and planning fun events for the next 3 weekends (my 30th, our Anniv, and Mother's Day).

--I also want to start swimming more regularly since the weather is warming up -- as is our pool. Hunter loves it in the water and will be learning Drowning Prevention techniques this summer since we're surrounded by pools, lakes, and oceans living down here.

--I've been cooking and baking once per week -- which is the most my mom will let me get away with -- and have tried some new yummy recipes too! I'll start posting them when I can...

--Hunter had his first trip to the ER on Monday night at 3am! He took a tumble down a few stairs and seemed fine but when he woke up in the middle of the night crying and touching his head, we feared the worst. So Mom & I took him in to the ER -- we were in and out in less than an hour -- and all is well, thankfully. It just was a precursor of what's to come with two little active boys who have no fear...the joys of motherhood.

--I take my glucose test on Friday (for Gestational Diabetes). They suggested I eat a candy bar before I come in. I am seriously spreading the word about this because in NJ they told me you can opt out of the nasty syrup drink and eat jellybeans instead and here they told me you can either eat 150 carbs of a candy bar or mix the syrup with soda. I feel like it is my duty to tell all preggy women I see that these are alternatives. When I took my test with Hunter, I ended up in the ER from dehydration b/c the glucose syrup made me so sick. Please spread the word -- you can eat CANDY!!! :) Yum.

--We are still house-hunting but we're taking it slower than we initially planned because Trav is working on a Consulting job that could determine our plan of action (whether we stay in FL or move back to NY or...). So with that up in the air, we don't want to buy something small right away (like a condo, which is what we had planned) if we end up living here (because we would need a larger home.)

--Hunter starts part-time daycare on Monday, May 4th. Stay tuned for emotional posts...

Time with Friends

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Recently, with my preggy symptoms kicking my a**, I've been shying away from social gatherings to avoid being the Debbie Downer.

(i.e.:

)

I don't want to be the girl who ruins the buzz... ;)

However with one of my best friends (whom I've known since we were 5) getting married this weekend, I couldn't make any excuses...I attended a Bachelorette dinner last night at Kres Downtown *I'd attach pics but they are too naughty* and a Bridal Mini Spa Day and Lunch at Lago in Baldwin Park today. Tonight Diana visited with Hunter and I for awhile and we exchanged our April Birthday gifts and caught up with girl-talk. Tomorrow is the wedding so Trav & I will drop Hunter off at my brother's house for a few hours while we celebrate Lu & Steve's special day.

Anyway, the point is -- while I'm physically uncomfortable and mentally drained from all I've been experiencing recently with our move, caring for Hunter, and being 8 months preggy -- I really enjoyed seeing my girlfriends and doing things just for me and for my social life.

I felt like a person again and it felt really good.

I keep telling myself that soon enough I will be doing these types of things regularly but I allow my symptoms to take hold of my decision-making ability. Then I say "well after Kingston is born I'll be back to my normal social-butterfly life" but I don't want to keep putting off my happiness.

I need to think of me in order to be a good mom and wife. We've all heard it a hundred times and we're aware of it yet we still struggle with finding that balance.

So instead of just juggling doctor appointments, play-dates for Hunter, Trav's out-of-town schedule, and my ouchy days, I am going to add one more component to my To Do list.

Me-Time.

Although it takes time away from my limited resources already, it is so fulfilling that it boosts my spirits and productivity in other aspects of my life. Something I can't afford to do without.

While I am at it, I also noticed a bad habit I must've adopted after giving birth to Hunter. It's so normal to me I have to really force myself not to do it these days...

I add "real quick" to the end of every sentence regarding my basic needs.

"Trav, can you watch Hunter? I'm gonna go to the bathroom real quick."

"Mom, can you keep an eye on him for 5 minutes? I'm gonna take a shower real quick."

"________(fill in the blank with whomever is around)_______, can you make sure he doesn't climb the entertainment center? I'm gonna grab some dinner real quick."

Why the urgency? Don't I deserve some time off to pee, eat, shower, and whatever else my body needs/wants? No one placed that expectation on me. I did it to myself. And now I've set a precedent. It's odd b/c when Trav eats, he takes his time. Same with his bathroom and shower schedule...so why should I be any different?

I feel like it may be related to the Mommy Guilt we feel. As though we should feel guilty for doing something that could take time away from our little ones. Well, newsflash ---> pretty soon, once my 2nd baby is born, I really WON'T have extra time. SO that shower or the potty break or sandwich will be my only relief away from Mommyhood.

And I am going to take full advantage.

At least, I'm going to try.

I need to take time to eat, stretch, shower and do my hair -- to feel like a deserving, worthy person in order to function like the strong maternal example I strive to be.

Having our Mommy's Helper has shown me that during my 4 hours off each afternoon, I don't need to handle "business" like errands and phone calls...I need to focus on me and my wants & needs. The days that I do that, I feel SO much more well-rested and engaged in Hunter's development.

So Adios "real quick"! Don't let the doorknob hit ya on the way out!

Easter

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This was Hunter's second Easter -- but he was SO young last year I am counting it as his first "real" Easter because he was actually able to participate in the festivities this year. :)

We had an Easter Egg hunt with his cousin Ashley at my brother's house.

We colored eggs. I made cookies. We gorged ourselves on naughty food and candies.

It. Was. Divine!

Here are a few of the pics from our weekend together. Hunter's been walking a couple of weeks now but it always amazes me, for some reason, to see him walking in pictures...

Kingston's ETA

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Has been changed from May 28th (C-section date up in NJ) to June 3rd (C-section date here in Orlando).

JUNE 3rd!

LESS than 8 weeks...

I need a drink! ;)

Long Days

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There are less than nine weeks to go before Kingston arrives. Less than eight if you consider the c-section date my due date.

I am SO ready to no longer be pregnant! While I can not WAIT to meet Kingston and love him and be his Mommy, I feel sad that these are the last days and weeks that Hunter will have me all to himself. Writing this is actually making me cry because I don't verbalize that feeling very often nor do I consciously think about it.

At least living here and having family so close will allow me the opportunity to leave Kingston home when I want to do something special for Hunter and vice-versa. Not that they'll often be apart in that type of scenario but I'll have that option.

Hunter has grown so much in the past 14 months...he's become quite the little toddler,

especially lately now that he's walking. It's so strange to think that for half of his short life I've been pregnant. A part of me is anxious to be my "old" self again and be able to be the active mom I was when he was still in infancy. He didn't need it as much then but I had such a high energy level and I look forward to sharing it with him again once I am not lugging around an additional 40 lbs.

As far as updates go, Trav has been doing some consulting for a past employer so he's been busy and had some new-found "purpose" in life. He comes home by dinner so I'm a happy gal. What makes me even happier is hiring the Mother's Helper last weekend. Woohoo! She comes for 4 hours per day (in between Hunter's 2 naps) to be my "hands" since carrying Hunter and caring for Hunter has become a challenging task to take on solo.

While Trav is at work, my helper comes...that's the deal. It works well for us because Trav needs time to focus on his consulting project and I am physically unable to care for Hunter all day so both of us have some relief.

Yesterday she and I took Hunter to the park where he met a cute little 1-year old named Samantha. They sat on the swings and cooed at each other for about an hour before we came home.

I have lots of Orlando Momma friends with babies Hunter's age range but we've yet to see a lot of each other because it's taken so long for me to get settled. Now that I *finally* unpacked my last box this afternoon, I plan on getting together with them more often.

The weather here is beautiful, breezy, and sunny. Hunter's been swimming twice since we arrived, even though it's WAY chilly in the pool. He seems to love it!

The hardest adjustment has been missing my WNY Mommy friends. I talk to some of them every 4 days or so but it's not the same here...when I go to my corner grocery store I don't run into any familiar faces. Ok, I take that back. Two days ago I ran into a friend I hadn't seen since I was 18 -- BUT it's different nonetheless.

Another challenge is trying to find a balance for Hunter between Grandparent-love which includes partially ignoring my instructions added with continuous attention...this is turning Hunter into a whiny baby and it's frustrating to say the least. I tried so hard to keep him even-tempered (when I could) back home but now there is interference. As soon as Hunter whines, even if it's just because I am putting him on the floor after changing his diaper, someone will inevitably say "What's the matter baby?" in a coo-ey voice and it's over. We get full on pouty, quiver lips and crocodile tears. That is NOT the baby I've been raising for a year!

Overall, I can honestly say our move down was the best choice for our family. I needed the support from my Mom and Dad. We were no longer tied to NY through Trav's job and had the opportunity to take advantage of our free time. Our parents are getting to see more of Hunter, which is SO important to me. And we're living in a family-friendlier climate. Maybe one day we'll be back up in NY but until then, I feel like this is where we belong. At home.

Fun in the Sun

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I haven't posted recently because Hunter has been keeping me busy - until today ---> my first day with a Mother's Helper. Hooray!! :)

Anyway, here are some pics of this weekend...we splashed in the pool and played in the playground...life is rough! ;)

Bedtime Stories

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Since Hunter was a little moosh (mouse) he loved to be read to. Early on, he learned how to hold a book and mimic the sound of reading with patterned garbles.

My all-time favorite author is Shel Silverstein with "The Giving Tree" being my all-time favorite book. Tonight, I read to Hunter from Silverstein's "Where the Sidewalk Ends" and thoroughly enjoyed the poem:

Forgotten Language

Once I spoke the language of the flowers,
Once I understood each word the caterpillar said,
Once I smiled in secret at the gossip of the starlings,
And shared a conversation with the housefly
in my bed.
Once I heard and answered all the questions
of the crickets,
And joined the crying of each falling dying
flake of snow,
Once I spoke the language of the flowers. . . .
How did it go?
How did it go?

Shel Silverstein

Then, once Hunter was asleep I opened my latest issue of Cookie Magazine and noticed they, too, highlighted an excerpt of this poem in their April issue. Weird...but I guess not so weird because it's such a beautiful expression of how our youth, innocence, open-mindedness, and imagination is so easily lost as we age and become cynical young adults. Then we have our own children and we're reminded of how purely they view the world around them. It's an enlightening thing to have a child embark on discovery. I feel privileged to share in Hunter's wonder. It makes me feel fortunate to have a "second perspective" on life.

Weekend Update

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I realize I'm not posting new entries daily -- there is little news to tell and I am not feeling 100% inspired yet. Once we are settled in and Trav arrives there will be plenty of

fodder, I'm sure. ;) So today's post will just be a pictorial update on what we've done since arriving in Central Florida.

We landed Wednesday (see first post) and finished unpacking and getting settled by Thursday. We spent Thursday "exploring" the house -- Hunter, who started to

walk the night before we left Jersey -- is loving the hardwood floors b/c they help him balance better than the carpeting we had up north. He is NOT, however, loving the weather. The windows are open and it's sunny, breezy, and beautiful out but Hunter is sweating so much I am considering Botox treatment for his glands. He is in TROUBLE when he reaches adolescence- poor kid!

On Friday my niece, Ashley, arrived. She stayed the weekend while her parents went to

Key Biscayne for the tennis match. She's turning 6 this summer and has been the only child and also the only grandchild here in Orlando for awhile. Naturally, I had a lot of explaining to do this weekend as she didn't understand why Hunter was "such a baby" (her words). ;) My

explanation? Because he IS a baby. That's where the terminology comes from.

While it was a difficult transition for her, they really enjoyed each other's company and Hunter learned a word faster than ever -- "Ash" for Ashley.

By the end of their first full day together, he was calling out for her. It was too cute!! I didn't realize he was capable of learning words so quickly...I've been trying to teach him to say "nose" for 3 months and he still just honks my nose and says "boo".

Here's a pic of Hunter and Ashley after jumping on the bed for what seemed like hours...I love H's expression! Unfortunately, Ashley had her eyes closed in every shot so I just selected one:

Friday afternoon, my girlfriend Coleen came over to give everyone haircuts -- including Hunter and Ashley. They both got lollipops for being such good clients. :) Hunter took his out of his mouth and rubbed it all over his head and got hair stuck to it and then ate it! Yuck!

Saturday morning we all went to the Winter Park Farmer's Market together and ate breakfast and bought some fresh veggies. Hunter ate my entire Quiche Lorraine! After

the shopping we went to the park and Ashley chased squirrels while Hunter found a new girlfriend (a few months older than he is) to make out with. She reminded me of Madeleine so I started really missing Kellie! Here's a pic of Hunter and Ashley with their GrandMama:

...Hunter and his GrandPapa:

Saturday evening I took Hunter to my BFF, Yen's, house for

her son's 5th Birthday party. There were other kids there but no one was interested in playing with Hunter...awwwww...so he took to crawling all over Yen's house as I followed him with my camera. Here's the clique shunning him:

...Payton's room:

...Yen's room:

...caught being chased:

Sunday we spent some time outdoors -- it rained in the a.m. but was beautiful out in the afternoon and evening so we ate our meals by the pool and stuck our toes in the water. I also took Hunter to Target and reveled in the fact that the stores around here all stay open on Sundays. Hallelujah! I DON'T miss that (Sunday Stores Closed) about WNY. I should add that to my list.

Today I went to see my Acupuncturist, whom I consider to be a real-life healer. If any of you make it to Orlando you HAVE to schedule an appointment with Heidi. She totally rocks. She specializes in Fertility and Women's Issues and I'm convinced she had a part to play in Hunter's conception b/c she was treating me for cramping and other abdominal pain associated with "girl problems" right before we conceived. I wasn't going to her for that exactly but I am thankful nonetheless.

After Hunter's morning nap we went swimming and laid out in the sun to warm up after the cool dip. Then we came inside and enjoyed the sunlight streaming through the open windows:

I have lots of Playdates scheduled with our Mommy Friends down here starting next week...I've also scheduled dentist, OB, and Pediatrician appts for us so we'll start being a little busier soon.

Until then, it's been nice to get some R&R (well as much as I can get these days) and play each day by ear. Life is slower-paced down here and it suits us just fine!

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